Happiness is an inside job, so we’re told.
The emotion happens inside of us, a result of a cocktail of naturally produced happiness hormones released by our brain when we’re doing things like exercise, hugging, and listening to music. Only you yourself can get to the crux of what makes you personally feel happy in your heart and when you realise what, commit to filling your life up with more of the same.
Of course, every day can’t be a sunny one and none of us are immune to life’s sorrows, harsh times, and tough challenges that inevitably come along, and are completely out of our control. But what is in our control is how we deal with them, equipping ourselves with coping mechanisms to help us get through as best we can. Even in the most difficult of times though, if we look hard enough, we can almost always find a little something to appreciate and be thankful for. It’s small wonder that people who count their blessings tend to be happier. An intentional decision, however small, to help us feel better about a situation is a healthy habit to practice at.
Could this mean then that we can wake up every morning and choose to be in a good mood? That would imply that happiness is a choice, and not just reserved for those ‘naturally happy’ people with a sunny disposition to experience. A provocative suggestion that’s forever being debated, and it certainly isn’t everyone’s reality. However, even making just a few positive alterations like writing down a way you’ll make today great for yourself each day or saying an affirmation out loud is still being intentional and works well for some people without the over-whelming thought that we need to self-regulate our emotions.
However divided we all are in our opinions, we humans share one commonality – the desire to be happy. If asked, we’d all have different explanations of what happiness means to us personally, and as we move along through life our priorities tend to change anyway. We start to place higher value on things that once didn’t bother us, or might have taken for granted, like our good health, independence, and sense of belonging.
It’s worth cherishing those kinds of things while you have them, you’ll more than miss them if they go.
Think about the last time you felt happy. Not necessarily the euphoric kind, but that slow-burn feeling of contentment, at peace with life as it is and feeling right where you wanted to be. What was it you were doing and who were you with? Being aware of what conjures up those feelings within you can help you understand what puts you in your happy place, and then you can aim to do more of what makes you feel good. It will do wonders for your wellbeing.
Happiness can be measured too, according to the United Nation’s annual World Happiness Report. The metrics are the presence of positive emotions, absence of negative emotions, and life satisfaction. According to the study, the happiest country in the world in 2023 is Finland. Finns gave a rating of 7.842 out of a possible 10. Also ranking high is Sweden, well known for their love of Hygge, social equality, and healthy work-life balance.
Born happy
The more curious amongst you might be pondering by now whether happy people live contrasting lives to their more discontented counterparts, or could they just be born that way. Might those who always look on the bright side be viewing the world through a totally different lens to their gloomier, glass half empty counterparts. There’s plenty of evidence to suggest it’s quite a complex matter.
Dr John A Schindler defines happiness as “a state of mind in which our thinking is pleasant a good share of the time”.We know through extensive research that happiness is good for us, both mentally and physically. Our thoughts are more helpful to us, all our senses come alive, and we just function better all round.
When you can’t change the direction of the wind, adjust your sails.
H Jackson Brown, Jnr
True contentment though, the lasting kind, comes from a deep satisfaction within. It is a state we produce by our attitude which then manifests into our behaviours and actions. Those material things that we associate with our success and happiness gives them far too much power over our lives. You’d end up feeling terrible if they were gone. Physical, material things bring us temporary pleasure, which is different to true long-lasting happiness cultivated within.
Some people can be at the very top of their game, have millions in the bank, own property all over the world, and drive top of the range cars, yet feel empty and unsatisfied inside. It’s a fascinating phenomenon how fulfilment and inner peace can elude one person with all those so-called riches in life, and yet somebody else without any of those material things lives a perfectly contented and happy life, rich in intangible things you can’t see, like love, kindness, and compassion.
Practising feeling happy can really make a difference to our mindset. Find ways every day to be more kind, loving, appreciative, generous, gracious, and compassionate. Not just to the people around you, but to yourself too. You will set yourself up as a magnetic force, attracting positivity towards you. The more you pay attention to the good, the more good will come to you.
Lots of us live life these days full on in the fast lane, trying our best to juggle work commitments, care for our home and close family, and stay in touch with friends and family. We fall into bed each night frazzled, still chewing over hundreds of thoughts about things that happened yesterday, today, and haven’t even happened yet. Before we know it, we’re existing daily in what feels like a pressure cooker of anxiety, and it becomes imperative for our wellbeing to let off the steam. When it does come time to relax though, we keep up the time-consuming distractions by thoughtlessly scrolling through our devices, and binge-watching that limited series on TV. Time poverty, feeling there’s not enough time in the day, causes us no end of tension and frustration, which isn’t good for us long-term. The very fact that you’ve created this way of life, means that you are capable of creating a different quality of life. Living an ‘always on’ life leaves us just scratching the surface of all we really are as amazing human beings. The more stretched for time people feel, there more likely there will be an absence of healthy habits that contribute towards good health and wellbeing, and happiness. Things like exercise, spending time outdoors, being present and in the moment, cooking nutritious food for our precious bodies, a sense of adventure and spending quality, fun time with our loved ones. Taking time for self-care is fundamental to living – and staying – well for a lot longer. There isn’t a soul on earth who wouldn’t be happy about that.
